2010 Resolutions?!
Tonight was one of those nights that I wanted to write something awe-inspiring and so deep, that you thought you was talking to John from revelation (you know, that "let me read that part again because it's so tight" type of writing). But when I got on to write, I ended up reading a blog of a few of my acquintances. After reading their blogs, I had so many thoughts about my life and wondered, why don't I speak to these individuals as much as I used to or even want? Is the desire even their?
With these thoughts in mind, it dawned on me that I've been meaning to share with you what I believe will be my 2010 "RESOLUTION". Let me first say, I hate resolutions. I believe it's a list that people make to make themselves feel better about not accomplishing the things they wanted to see happen last year. Most of the time they don't do it, so it's a waste of time and creates false expectations (I am all about efficiency). Please do not mistake this to mean I don't believe in planning. I like planning (alot) and if I had it my way, I would plan everything all the time. However, I know myself and I have limit my extravagent planning so that I can let the LORD come in and have HIS way.
This leads me to say what my real purpose and striving will be in 2010. My true aim in 2010 (and really for the rest of my life) is to become more transparent. I acutally prayed about this with a friend at life group last week but I really want this to happen more. There are a few people that I can open up and share my heart with and I am so grateful for those people in my life. However, I do notice that I put my heart on lock around others. And we are right to guard our hearts, using GODLY wisdom and building trust with those we want to grow deeper with. However, there is that element of openness that must be present. And there are elements that keep us from being open. I want to address those issues, move beyond offense or just misunderstanding and move to a place where I express my true heart at the time. This is a lot of work, but unlike a resolution, the long term results are worth it!
So this is my striving in 2010: that I will display a heart of grace with everyone I come in contact with, even if I am tempted to think the bad, looking beyond my what I see and believe that their is good and find it. And if I can't see the good, moving to a place with people where my perceptions can be confronted with reality. In short, I want to move to a place of maintaining who I am as a person but truly loving and opening and sharing my heart with people, just because I love people and just because this is how JESUS loves me!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
It's been a long time!
Hey Guys! It's been a long time since I've written anything. But don't worry, I've got much to say. First off, GOD has really been doing so much in my life. There were times that I wanted to write but I just didn't have the confidence or didn't really know if what I wrote one day would be my situation the next. One thing I have learned though is that while my situations may change, and things may look dim, GOD plans and purposes always prevail as I remain faithful in those harvest times and the unpleasant or comfortable ones.
One story I do want to share and I believe this is from the Heart of GOD for HIS children, is about this song I was listening to. On a Saturday afternoon, I was home and I wanted to clean the dishes and fix up the living room. Somethings just needed a fine cleaning and that day I was in the mode to do it. So I was listening to one of my Worship mixed CD's while I was in the kitchen washing the dishes. Then, I looked at the living room and said to myself, I need some fast songs to get me through this one. I felt so unmotivated and overwhelmed because I knew it would take alot of my energy. So I decided to put in CeCe Winans CD Alabastor Box and boy, I got so much energy. I was dusting and cleaning tables! I was so excited. Then I came this song: Blessed, Broken and Given. This song describes JESUS (disguised) as he walks with two men (they were nameless) on the Road to Emmaus. These two men were so troubled that JESUS was crucified and didn't understand how someone so wonderful, so giving, so full of life could die the death of a sinner. JESUS just walked with them and listened to them. Then He began to give them the word to help them understand who JESUS really was. Then he had communion with them. It was when he blessed the bread that their eyes were enlightened that HE was JESUS and HE was still alive. As I listened to the words of this song, the LORD gently spoke to my heart and said, this is where I want you to be. And I thought about it and said yes LORD. Let me be that one that one that will walk with people in their confusion, misunderstandings about GOD, hurt and maybe even the betrayal they may have or think they have experienced. Let me give them your WORD to your people and let me not be afraid to go to that place of communion. Let there eyes be opened to your love oh LORD! I can say that GOD is faithful and has allowed this to happen for HIS GLORY!
I pray the same for all of us. That we will say yes to going all the way with GOD and loving what HE loves... HIS hurt and broken people who HE wants to heal and bring into relationship with HIM. I pray for humility to come into our lives to not have all the answers but just be there for people. I pray that we will be used to pour HIS love in the lives of others and I pray that as we are used to heal others, we allow others to be used to bring healing to us!
Love ya!
One story I do want to share and I believe this is from the Heart of GOD for HIS children, is about this song I was listening to. On a Saturday afternoon, I was home and I wanted to clean the dishes and fix up the living room. Somethings just needed a fine cleaning and that day I was in the mode to do it. So I was listening to one of my Worship mixed CD's while I was in the kitchen washing the dishes. Then, I looked at the living room and said to myself, I need some fast songs to get me through this one. I felt so unmotivated and overwhelmed because I knew it would take alot of my energy. So I decided to put in CeCe Winans CD Alabastor Box and boy, I got so much energy. I was dusting and cleaning tables! I was so excited. Then I came this song: Blessed, Broken and Given. This song describes JESUS (disguised) as he walks with two men (they were nameless) on the Road to Emmaus. These two men were so troubled that JESUS was crucified and didn't understand how someone so wonderful, so giving, so full of life could die the death of a sinner. JESUS just walked with them and listened to them. Then He began to give them the word to help them understand who JESUS really was. Then he had communion with them. It was when he blessed the bread that their eyes were enlightened that HE was JESUS and HE was still alive. As I listened to the words of this song, the LORD gently spoke to my heart and said, this is where I want you to be. And I thought about it and said yes LORD. Let me be that one that one that will walk with people in their confusion, misunderstandings about GOD, hurt and maybe even the betrayal they may have or think they have experienced. Let me give them your WORD to your people and let me not be afraid to go to that place of communion. Let there eyes be opened to your love oh LORD! I can say that GOD is faithful and has allowed this to happen for HIS GLORY!
I pray the same for all of us. That we will say yes to going all the way with GOD and loving what HE loves... HIS hurt and broken people who HE wants to heal and bring into relationship with HIM. I pray for humility to come into our lives to not have all the answers but just be there for people. I pray that we will be used to pour HIS love in the lives of others and I pray that as we are used to heal others, we allow others to be used to bring healing to us!
Love ya!
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